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Hi everyone,
Further to Dr. B's blog post (and also following on from my apt. last week) I have been thinking about this; that the way I have approached getting better has been an evolution. When I first started treatment with Dr. Grant in London, I cut out sugar and actually almost all carbs. I improved, but came to a stand still. I started treatment with Dr. B in Oct. 2012, and made further changes. I changed my cleaning products to natural ones. Changed products that I use to natural ones. Added carbs back in, but I now realize, too much carbs. (I will post about that separately!). I haven't yet changed my make up to natural make up, because i don't use it daily. And I was never a severe case of IC. Perhaps that will be my next step. Because i am not 100% symptom free, i do need to continue and improve.
Even though I stick to the diet 90% of the time, I often crave sugar. And wish i could have it. And then sometimes i do have a dessert / afternoon tea! (Not lately though, i have been much more strict and haven't had sugar in over a month).
But i feel and hope that the next step on this healing path is to view sugar and the way I eat differently. To think 'I don't want to eat that'. I think i am getting there, because i had a bite of my husbands kit kat about a month ago, it tasted sooo sweet that i didn't like it and had to spit it out. The way Dr. B described her approach to food in the blog post has been very helpful.
Maybe it would be nice to share here how you all have felt on this journey, with regard to your approach to food, or other changes you have made, and refining your diet along the way and feeling more positive about it rather than deprived.
C
This process has been very
This process has been very difficult and I have a terrible relationship with food, and have since childhood and trying to figure out what I could and couldn't eat that didn't cause pain and indigestion. This has not improved for me during treatment either. Still have hard time figuring out food, extreme nausea at times, which makes me angry towards food. It will be interesting to see what others have to say because I'm struggling and my view on food at this point is awful and absolutely feel deprived after 3.5 years in treatment.
Argh! I just wrote a post and
Argh! I just wrote a post and then lost it somehow! Let's try again....
The gist of it was that I love food!! I look forward to the next meal after a meal I've just had lol I am very emotionally connected to it. I have even had a panic attack at a family gathering because I couldn't eat any of the dishes (my favourites!) because of the spices, tomato etc. I have noticed that when I eat what I want (doesn't necessarily mean unhealthy treats, even veggies not on list 1) I am so much relaxed, happy and don't feel 'ill'. I won't be so bothered about symptoms. In fact, when I too started treatment in London with a urologist, he put me on an IC smart diet which at that time depressed me but oh my! that was like heaven compared to me on list 1 now lol. I was 'allowed' to eat so much more (even sugar!!) and thinking back, I was definitely a happier person (though in still in some pain/discomfort) but I did want to experience the burning anymore and the urologist was not helping so I opted for treatment with the Brizmans. It's a vicious cycle because all these restrictions stress me out but cheating on the diet does not do good either although it makes me feel happy, it's damaging to the health. So at the moment I am trying to find a balance. Although on the odd occasion when I do cheat, i feel so guilty afterwards that i feel emotionally worse than before. Then are there times I thoroughly enjoy it like recently I went to Bath and I just had to experience the famous afternoon tea and o-m-g...so worth it!!! To be honest, I felt fine after that but still it's not something I do regularly.
As for the cravings, I can't say that I don't crave sugar at all but I definitely don't crave as much as I used to. If there is a cake/donut/chocolate in front of me, it is an internal battle to not have any but I am managing it better as time goes on. Maybe there'll come a time when I won't even have to battle, I just won't be tempted until then, I have to keep reminding myself that these are the reasons that I am here in the first place. I think it will take some mind conditioning. Reading that blog was very interesting and quite helpful actually. In my opinion, the mind has a very strong part to play in this condition, certainly in the way we view food. At times I'd want something just because I can't have it! It's human nature really, "you want what you can't have". So to see not consuming unhealthy food as a choice rather than deprivation is a great approach, one which I will try and use. The other thing I think is to cheat regularly is so pointless because all this effort that I'm putting in to get better will be totally wasted. I may enjoy the cheat for those few minutes but lose all the hours of discipline I put in plus adding more effort to get over the consequences and more time stuck on the current list.
I agree that some treats just taste so sickeningly sweet that you won't be tempted again, which is good a way! On the way to work I pass Sainsburys in the morning and can smell their bakery, admittedly very tempting at times but more recently I can just smell the sweetness and I think yuk (I really hope this mentality lasts because I used to be a bakery fanatic!) I also use normal make up but very minimal. I do though, use normal Garnier hair dye once a month which I should probably switch to natural dye but not ready for that change. Too many changes = too overwhelming = stress = symptoms heighten.
Anyway enough of my rambling...all in all, still a long way to go but for me the approach to food starts with dealing with the mind and with that, emotions can be managed. Also, a key thing I have learnt - patience, patience and more patience. On a positive note, I look forward to moving on to list 2...opens up a lot more variety for me = happier, calmer me! :) See this a journey and not a battle.