How do we believe that we can get well? That is my question for today as I comtinue to be pretty laid up with these creaky, sore knees that swell at the slightest use.  I did not believe that I could get better from IC even though others told me I could not. But I hunkered down and did the protocol because I felt that I had tried everything else. Here, my symptoms are strange (although addressed in the dissertation) but I keep searching for the right answer, trying a lot of things rather  than investing in what Matia, Boaz and my rolfer are telling me- which is that this is more about not doing rather than undoing.

The dissertation says  that the protocol works by tonifying Yang, Yin, blood and qui to release toxic fluids from body tissues, joints, muscles lymphatic and circulatory systems through stool, urine, skin and sexual fluid."

So that would seem to fit here. Where I get stuck is, " I didn't come in with joint pain. Instead my bladder got better and simultaneous to that, I got joint pain.

So- I am writing it here as a first step: I am going to get better." I just have to know that.

I seem to be confusing that with expecting myself to be able to see how long it is going to take or what shape it is going to take.

Next, I need to figure out how to live in the interim and where to put my focus and where not to.

Also need to acknowledge in writing that I keep hurting myself with therapeutic exercises and so the message keeps being, leave the knee joints alone now.

All suggestions appreciated.

thanks for listening.

LOVE,,,