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Hi Everyone,
I'm really happy because my husband and I have started to be able to have sex again. Most of the time its without pain, but occaisionally I'm unable. I'm just really pleased with the change -- it used to be absolutely impossible, and I got IC just a month after we married!!
One thing I've noticed is that condoms are a problem for me. Presently we make love without condoms and he "pulls out" which I know is a lousy method of birth control.
I saw on another post that some Japanese condoms were recommended, but I noticed they are still latex. This makes me nervous. Can anyone comment on whether or not these have worked for you when other latex condoms did not?
Another person recommended lamb skin condoms, but no brand was mentioned. My husband and I have tried latex without lubrication, and polyurethene with lubrication (we can't find ones without it) and in all cases it has caused pain.
Can anyone comment on lamb skin condoms more in depth?
At present since my husband and I are using the "pull out" method, I'm concerned that we might get pregnant. I'd actually be happy if we did in some ways, but I don't want to derail treatment.
If in fact we did get pregnant I haven't been taking pre-natal vitamins (I know Matia doesn't think they're a good idea, especially in treatment) but I'm only a few months into treatment, so I'm nowhere near "balanced" which is what Matia says keeps people from having issues if they are not taking prenatal vitamins when they conceive.
I trust Matia, and I won't take folic acid etc, but its still frightening. Someone I know just had twins with spinabifida because she wasn't taken prenatal vitamins... so maybe I'm extra worried?
Can anyone comment on prenatal vitams? Anyone who is mostly better or who has had children -- could you fill me in on whether my husband and I are taking a really dangerous risk here?
Thanks everyone... somehow I'm always writing the most embarrassingly personal posts.....
Condoms
I cant do latex or lubricated. We use Durex brand, they are called "Avanti BARE next-to-nothing feel" 12 luxury Polyisoprene non-latex condoms. They do not bother me, although I HATE the feeling of condoms..but Matia says its a must.
I can't speak to your
I can't speak to your questions regarding condoms or prenatal vitamins, but I would like to reassure you that the "pull out" method is really not quite as dangerous as many of us have been led to believe. When done correctlly, it has been shown to be almost as effective as condoms. See the links below for articles.
I think it is so derided as a viable option because of the danger of not practicing it correctly, and the fact that sex is such a taboo topic in our society, it isn't as though a lot of people who want the information have access to it. I have gotten substantial heat from friends when they find out this is my method of choice, and have had healthcare practioners actually try to bully me into birth control bills/nuvaring/depo provera, etc, until I very firmly requested that my personal choice be respected, and that I had made an informed decision. Ultimately, birth control is a personal choice, and so long as you make an informed decision, it's really no one else's business. Not sure what my point here is exactly, except to provide you with some reassurance that you are not practicing a lousy method of birth control.
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Economy/story?id=7688558&page=1
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control/withdrawal-...
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/07/21/health/21cond.html
condoms
Pink Lady,Do not be embarrased as I was thinking about starting a post last night about condoms. I have been in treatment for 17 months and I have not had sex the ENTIRE time and the times that I have tried I ended up in tears! I might be reaching a place hopefully soon where I can think about trying again and have been looking at condoms but I CANNOT for the life of me and I scoured the internet I cannot find condoms that are nonlatex/non-lube condoms if they are non latex they have lube if they are non lubricated they are latex or lamb skin. I need to ask about the lamb skin -is that okay? Its is a "breathable " protection and only protects against pregnancy what about other microbes us ICers might be suseptible to? we are in treatment now and we have to protect our bodies from the potential that something our partner who may be healthy might be harboring. For example all of us have bacteria good and bad and our immune systems when strong protect us from stuff like staph and other potential infections but sperm and sometimes something MAtia calls "biofilms" in sperm ( what our partner eats) can be deterimental to IC/VV folks and cause us pain and flares from sex. I think that is why we have our partners where condoms. as far as the baby stuff goes- I always htought about myself that my body probably would not support a pregnancy if I managed to pregnant- considering just how nourishing and amazingly pure our diet is - I am not sure that we even need prenatals or maybe that is once we are balenced? I thought I recall her saying soemthing about that.- that if your diet is extra good you don't need them? I know that my GI tract is not getting the nourishment i am taking in so I would be worried about it too. Bring it up in your next session or maybe we can go over this at the saturday conference call and report back the findings regarding pregnancy/IC/diet/vtamins. Does anyone who has sex with condoms-what are the brands that do not bother you- d do you find that the lubricants of the condoms causes you to flare? Thanks for sharing! Mary
Condoms
I would suggest sending Matia and email on this topic. It would make an excellent blog post. I am guessing that she has a couple of favorite condom brands. We had been using Durex condoms, but they are irritating.
Pregnancy and IC
Go to the search engine and type in Pregnancy and IC or check it out in the April 09 archives. Great reads!Mary
Prenatal Vitamins
It must be a relatively new thing. I had my children more than 20 years ago long before I had IC and never even considered prenatal vitamins and my children were born perfectly healthy. I also had a terrible diet back then and I drank a fair bit of alcohol. Terrible really. (not during pregnancy but before)I think if you eat a well balanced diet and look after yourself you shouldn't need any vitamin supplements.
i've been using Japanese
i've been using Japanese Crown Skinless skin condoms for a while now. They are the BEST! Very strong, super thing, feels like they are they are not there at all. We both hate condoms and these are just a blessing! They were recommended by someone on this site a while back. Matia approves them too. I use Bomasense lubricant with them, and since I started using both of these products all the problems with sex have resolved! http://secure.condomania.com/productinfo.asp?number=C-CR-SLAs for the prenatal vitamins, I got pregnant while under Matia's care and the only things I took were Floravital (iron supplement, because I have a tendency to be anemic) and probiotics. Nothing else! I was, just like you, worried and worried about vitamins, but Matia explained that proper diet will definitely be enough for me and the baby, and she was absolutely right, my daughter was born with Apgar score 9 and so far didn't need even baby vitamins. I am sure that probiotics had something to do with it too. When you get pregnant, even if you finish treatment by then, I would recommend staying in close touch with Matia, she will guide you through it.
Thanks for your replies
Hi Everyone,
Thanks for all your great input. I learn so much from this website!@Melsvensen: My hubby and I have tried Avanti, but I had a major reaction -- I'm glad they work for you though =)
@Murphy325: I had no idea that the pull out method was that effective. Thanks so much for the articles. It makes sense really... Funny what they make us believe in school.
@Honeybee:It's a great idea to bring this up at the meeting... sadly I think I missed it! (crap!) Did you happen to ask if somehow becoming pregnant before finishing treatment (accidentally) is a problem because we're not taking prenatal vits and we're not balanced? I feel like such a heal for missing the conversation I had so many things to ask!
@Carole UK: You have a really good point. Plus I suppose that many women who have unplanned pregnancies probably aren't preping by taking prenatal vits. If we didn't take them for so many years, why would it be so important now?
@Natasha149: So you use those Japanese condoms without pain? Thats so interesting because I always assumed that the problem was latex, and those are latex condoms. Do you react to other types of latex condoms but not to these?
Sadly I'm not sexually active now. I'm having a major flare. I don't know if it's because of the sex or because of something else entirely. It's so confusing to go through this process. I even wonder if I have a yeast infection or a bladder infection... can that be caused by sex?
Ugh... and I was so happy. Presumably if I was well enough for love making for a while I can get back to being well enough again. I'm just a bit discouraged.
Thanks guys, you're all great.
I understand that feeling of
I understand that feeling of discouragement and sadness. But as you said, if you were well enough for love making for a while you can get back to that point again. Surprisingly, 4 months in for me, even though my bladder was not that much better I could finally have sex just fine no pain during/after, and sex was always the major flare-causer for me. Then a month later I had a setback that lasted months and no more sex. Then started on SF and for the longest time I think b/c it is so harsh and kicked up inflammation I couldn't have sex either. Now just this week we tried twice and no pain! even tho I'm still on SF, high dosage.
It's sad tho, it's hard for me to get too excited about any change b/c it's not always lasting, we can waver up and back until the cleansing is complete and our bodies are finally strong enough. So I just need to try to be happy for whatever good's in the moment and not think beyond that, bad or good.
I understand your pain.
Yes, these are the first
Yes, these are the first latex condoms that are not giving me problems, and I've tried many brands! I remember Matia saying something about the lubricant being the problem, not the latex, but you'd better double check with her first.
Avanti
The past three times I have used them now I have had burning while trying to be intimate..I am thinking now they are not working out. But, I do not know if its those of because its my period, or around my period. Its hard never knowing when it will hurt and when it wont. It makes getting excited about it very hard, because as he is getting all ready, I am freaking out in my mind wondering if I am about to get a big dose of pain..kinda kills my mood and makes things less lubricated..Our poor husbands (and boyfriends) they are sure dealing with IC as well.
natasha
Where do you get Japanese Crown Skinless skin condoms? Are they at the normal grocer or do you need to order?
I could only find them on the
I could only find them on the internethttp://secure.condomania.com/productinfo.asp?number=C-CR-SL
Crown Skinless Skin Condoms
I found the crown condoms on amazon for $3.95/dozen instead of $11.95/dozen
http://www.amazon.com/Okamoto-Crown-Skin-Less-12-Pack/dp/B0001Q67IW